When you’re a smartest person in your room, you realize you’ll hate yourself because it means you’re in the wrong room. You see news and hear speaks from other people that most of their smartest friend end up doing nothing compare to their most bastard friend.
I saw reddit questions: What stopped you from killing yourself?
And here is my answer.
I hate smart gifted kids as I hate older who see their smart gifted friends fail in life.
I learn everyday to avoid become them. I don’t want to be a book smart, to be a number one in academic. But it turned out my lust for recognition is higher than my ability to suppressed my desire. So I try everything I can to secure my position as someone who look smart in the number. And I knew it is all lie. You can easily manipulate everything in order to be number one. It’s not the number one that you should aim, but rather in the process of searching that is matter.
Thats why I hate it. I don’t want to be like them. I need to find my way. I don’t want any smartest kid in their room feel dismal because of their loneliness. I want them to feel that their loneliness is power. That loneliness that power them to create something. The anxiety that boost them to break the limit of everything so they can see what anyone can’t see. It should be something that empower them to create something miracle monster.
Thats why I need to remember my enemy. I don’t desire friends. I desire enenmy, for they make me feel alive only to crush them. I need them more than my friends. I don’t desire happiness. I desire revenge.
– SD
I hate my parents who can’t see my potentials.
I hate my SD teacher RH who swore at me can’t do well in exam because I’m too arrogant.
I hate FNH & FKM because they hate me for no reason.
I hate ANA because she didn’t remember me in college.
– SMP
I hate my 7th grade friends who mock my brother because he’s skinny. I hate my friends because they make me hate my brother just because he is what he is.
I hate my friends who say something bad about my mothers or my fathers.
I hate all my friends who laugh at the way I talk, the way I walk, the way I behave.
I hate AFF, because he’s a stupid arrogant son of a soldier and he need to be killed.
I hate BFJ for no reason.
I hate MAD who spit on my face.
I hate my teachers who look down on me.
I hate all my friends GWA MRN APR who engage me in games only to abandon me whenever I feel excited about the games.
I hate my seniors in SMP cause they didn’t let me to become a member of MPK.
I hate my friends and Pak C because they underestimate me in Futsal SMP.
I hate KSI and Pramuka club because they’re looked a freak so I didn’t continue to join their club.
I hate DUK because we only dated for a weeks.
I hate ADS because she’s too boring, superficial, and dumb.
I hate AHH because she sit in class everyday with an ugly guy.
I hate my teachers or homeroom teacher cause they never look at me and see my potentials, except miss Iis (english teacher).
I hate all my friends who call me ‘Tulang’ because I was too skinny at that time.
– SMA
I hate most of my classmates friends in >= 11 MR ARH EK because they’re too unintellectual insensitive prick superficial insufferable bastard.
I hate MHR because he stop me from become a leader of DKM. He doesn’t even see me as a person that can be changed to be better.
I hate CNA for recommending me to be leader of DKM, so she makes me hope that I can be better.
I hate RRI took a picture of me because he want to make fun of me.
I hate my teachers who can’t see my potentials.
– Kuliah
I hate MKD who ignores my messages.
I hate MR cause he can’t run Maung generation well and make all of members feel included.
I hate ML, M, or MA because they can’t run FUKI well and maximize the potential of their members.
I hate AS & FA who complicate the administration process.
I hate myself cause I can’t make friends.
– Job
I hate MF, ANH, BP, incompetent staff manager.
I hate NTI managers in general and Telkomsel.
I hate myself because I’ve just accepted stupid company..